Harry, Part 4

                                        

                                              
Harry 4
It's Draco's Birthday... I'll update two stories!
Harry stared down at Malfoy in his lap, who was still looking like death. The potion wasn't that instantaneous, but he definitely was breathing better. Harry couldn't believe that Malfoy had just curled up on the floor for three days straight and let himself waste away. He had been considering floating him to Madam Pomfrey, but his grey eyes had opened and were now regarding him with fear. His hands were shaking, and he looked ready to cry.
"P-Potter?"
"Yeah... it's me. Park-Pansy said that you weren't eating. Do you want to go to the infirmary?"
Malfoy looked away, shutting his eyes. "No. J-Just go. Get out of my room."
"I'm not going anywhere until you tell me what the hell is going on. You... you said those things to me. You pushed me away. Why are you acting like I hurt you?"
Tears came out, and Malfoy shook his head, though he hadn't opened his eyes. "I'm sorry I said... that."
Harry took a deep breath. Malfoy hadn't said anything that was reprehensible, and Harry really wanted to figure out what the fuck was going on in the idiot's head. Malfoy needed him to forgive him, and it wasn't that hard to give it.
"And I forgive you, okay?"
Malfoy ripped his eyelids back and stared up at him upside down. "What?"
"I accept your apology. It's okay. I'm not mad," Harry said, clearly. He had to remember that Malfoy was ill and might need extra time to process things.
Malfoy stared and shook his head. "No... why? I said... I've done so much to you."
"It's all in the past. I want to move forward, Mal-Draco."
He flinched. "Forward?"
"I want you to stop running away. We need to talk about what happened. Draco... we connected. There is no other explanation... and I want it back."
"You got your memories back," he said, flatly and looked away. Tears trailed down his cheek. He was hurt.
Harry's eyebrow rose. Malfoy knew that this would happen. "No, Draco... I didn't. I won't until you agree to do it with me."
Malfoy shook his head. "I don't want to remember."
Harry had to take a deep breath and try to understand Malfoy's thought process. His un-inhibited self wanted him and his inhibited self... wanted him, too. Three fucking days of not eating told Harry that much. Was Draco that scared of his father? Of being disowned? Or was it something else? "I've done so much to you," Draco just told him. Was this all... guilt? Guilt was something Harry could easily understand. Memories of Sirius, Remus, Fred, Dobby and all his friends he had lost in the war preyed on him in his nightmares and, apparently, in Draco's, as well.
"Tell me why Draco. Why don't you want to remember?"
Malfoy looked at him, again, and then away, again. The truth finally came from his lips. "It'll hurt too much."
Harry felt deep pain emulating in those words and, more importantly, his own soul. His core throbbed in response to Draco's pain. They were connected in a way that Harry just couldn't describe.
"No, it won't. We were happy, Draco. We choose each other."
"But we can't have each other. We can't have this."
"Why? Really, Draco... I'm trying to understand. Cause I can protect you from your father, and I'm pretty fucking rich now, too, if you didn't know. But I don't think you're that vain or scared. So... what is it?"
Malfoy shook his head, refusing to answer. Harry brought one hand to Malfoy's face and caressed it. Malfoy froze and closed his eyes, relishing the contact.
"Come on, Draco. Tell me why?"
More tears came out and he whispered, "Cause I don't deserve you."
Harry's soul writhed in agony, again, and he hooked his arms under Draco's and pulled him up into an embrace. His chin rested against Draco's head and his arms wrapped around Draco's chest.
"Oh, Draco..." he whispered into his ear. "Yes, you do.
Draco resolutely shook his head.
"Draco... I deserve you. I choose you. I choose us," Harry proclaimed and then kissed the top of his head.