Magic of the Marriage Market

The days after the feast to honour her apprenticeship to Master Gentileschi had given Edwina noting but time to think. With how Lord Daro had kissed her, touched her, loved her, she'd really assumed that meant that more than just his body had been willing. But then he'd set her down, covered himself in shame, and said it had been a mistake, that this shouldn't have happened, but he'd had too much to drink; he'd do right by her though.

She had felt beautiful, cherished, loved, but then simply cold. So, not knowing how else to survive her heartbreak, Edwina had told Lord Daro what she'd actually felt. How he need not worry about being bound to a woman he clearly wanted no life with, how she'd keep what happened between them the dirty little secret he wanted it to be, and then she'd straightened her skirts and walked back into the party like she didn't want to cry instead.

There was a worse feeling than loving a man you could never have; it was having him, believing it meant something to you both, only to learn it was just a bad decision on his part. Edwina hadn't felt so disgusted with herself before, and she couldn't talk to anyone about it; it was her shame to bear. Only Hida saw the vestiges of that mistake only moment before Blair did too. Suddenly the private humiliation was known, but Edwina felt less burdened by it instead of more. Hida's concerns about Edwina's consent and Blair's ready vitriol against 'dummy Daro' made her feel less small, and the repeated insistence that Hida could in fact get rid of a dead body for her helped Edwina laugh, and finally feel like her heart could beat again.

Maybe, if she were lucky, that'd be the end of her ordeal with first love. But the day she'd decided to put it all behind her was also the day she received a letter from Lord Daro, apologizing.

To my beloved Lady Edwina,

I must first apologize for all my abhorrent behaviour that at all implied that loving you could be a dirty little secret. You were, are, and will always be the brightest start in my night sky. I seek inspiration in your radiance, I'm guided by your constancy and majesty, and I love you even when I am despairingly unworthy of you. That I ever made you feel poorly is my sin to bear, and not a reflection on your excellence, and I only wish I could have properly expressed to you how I wished I had been man enough to love and romance you openly, unreservedly, so that the first time we made love wouldn't be a hurried affair against a balcony railing. Truthfully, I do not regret it at all, as the memory of loving you even in such a covetous way was inevitable as I have admittedly been tormented by your perfection for a long time now.

I am not writing a Letter of proposal to you out of a feeling of obligation; I do not want to marry you out of a sense of duty. I want to be your husband, and have you be my wife, simply because I am greedy for you. My days were better knowing I was going to spend some part of them with you.

And hate me for it if you must, but I pray to every kindly and wicked spirit who might be persuaded that our one intimacy results in a child so I can selfishly tie you to me all the more. I have been a gentleman, a mentor, and a friend to you, and now I beg of you to take me as your future husband. I want to share every moment you have, be a part of yours life as you study at the university and grow into a Master, and spend the rest of my days living the fantasy I've withheld for fear of condemning you. To a life with a man who will never be worthy of your excellence, intelligence, and pure hearted loveliness. For I may have never crossed a line as your mentor, but as I promised you that night, I would ruin us both and I have. I ache for you like a man drowning at sea aches for dry land, I hunger for you as a prisoner does his last mean, and I dream of you with the same fanaticism as the gambler at a bettering hall.

You are worthy of every star in the night sky, and I will always be in awe of your magnificence. I should have Courted you properly, but instead I managed to take a beautiful night and ruin it for you with my heartless, thoughtless words.

If you can forgive me, tolerate me, love me ever again, I am yours. If you'll have me, wed me, fill my life with the memories we'll share together, I will follow you to the ends of the world. I can only beg that you le me indulge in my obsession with you where my love for you can be a strength to you.

And finally, an explanation for you as to why this letter has taken so long to reach you; I needed the time to select the perfect ring because I wish, above all things, to marry you and be your loving husband.

Imploringly Yours, Daro

There was a ring box included, but Edwina hadn't dared look at it. She read the letter repeatedly, able to recite the entire thing exactly but still not able to process it fully. It was like her head and her heart spoke two unfamiliar languages and for the first time in her life, she felt graceless. So, Edwina did the only thing she could think of to do; she took the letter with her to Blair's room.

It was still early enough in the day that Blair hadn't absconded yet, but late enough that she'd actually be back from her usual late night carousing. Although Blair was Courting Earl Wignell now, she still enjoyed socializing at the entertainment houses and betting halls. Oddly enough, even Edwina had expected the Earl to be a good influence on Blair, but it wasn't like her sister was immoral, just rebellious. And considering how Edwina's own romance was trampling all over 'stodgy traditions', it'd likely be in poor taste to criticize now.

Her knock at Blair's bedroom door was met with silence, so like a good sister, Edwina invited herself in; not at all surprised to find Blair still snoring heavily in bed. And because she was still trying to process Lord Daro's letter, Edwina moved almost stiffly across the room until she was standing next to Blair.

"He sent me a private letter, begging me to marry him," Edwina was surprised to hear her voice sounded angry.

"Huu," Blair snorted, head jerking up as Edwina suddenly roused her, "what? What's happening?"

"Lord Daro apologized, and then confessed his love, obsession, and verdant desire to be my husband," she handed her still half-slumbering sister the letter Daro had sent, "and there's this," she held the ring box up, still unable to peer inside.

Blair was blinking bleary eyes, hair tousled into a golden rat's nest, and drool dried on her cheek as she read the letter, "my brain is not braining, are you happy, sad, or angry?" Blair glared at Edwina like it was her fault Blair wasn't a morning person.

"I..." Edwina's mouth clenched shut and she pursed her lips, "I don't know."

"Sit," Blair sounded more awake, and somehow amused. "I need a drink if I, the surprise virgin, have to deal with your night of debauchery."

"It's still breakfast time," Edwina objected instinctively.

"Not on the Southern Island, now shut up Eddy, and sit down," Blair toasted her with what had been a water glass.

"Pour me one too," Edwina's sigh was pure capitulation.

"Not until we know if you're pregnant or not, we can't pickle the little bean," Blair shook her head no and Edwina's surprise left Blair laughing. "You can't drink, but you can think; so, use that pretty head of yours Eddy, tell me how this letter is making you feel."

Edwina clutched the ring box tightly, looking at the letter in Blair's hand but not needing it to see the words. "In one night, he'd given me the love I'd always dreamt of and a heartbreak out of nightmare. It's been a week, and although the marks left on my skin have begun to face, the ones on my heart still bleed. And then this letter, this apology and proposal and confession!"

Blair was giving her an amuse look, as if she already knew where Edwina's growing outrage would lead her. "How dare he? If he wanted to apologize, he can come do it to my face! And then he can propose to my face as well! I may want to marry that man but I will not let him get through it so easily," Now her sister's eyes twinkled with a likely urge to point out how easy Edwina had made certain things, "silence Blair, I need you to come with me, not criticize me."

"Well, let me get right on that," Blair smiled and casually drank her wine.

"Blair," Edwina's argument got cut off.

"Write him a letter," her sister's advice made her pause.

"What?" she'd expected more shenanigans.

"Write him a letter, a brief one," Blair explained. "Come say this to my face and send him the ring box back too."

For the first time since she'd read the letter, Edwina felt her chest loosen, "I can do that."

"Good, now go do that, I need my beauty sleep," Blair waved her off and shuffled back to her bed.

"Thank you, Blair," Edwina headed out.

"Don't thank me Eddy, you'll still have to explain to Alaric why your once mentor is proposing," Blair's warning chased her out.

She headed back to her room, writing the correspondence as Blair had advised, and sent it off before heading to her eldest sibling's office. While their parents were on Expedition, Alaric was the interim Count, so it made sense that he used their parents' office, but Edwina still felt it jarring to not see her mother or father there. Her knock at his open door had Alaric looking up from his own morning post.

"Good morning, Winnie, what can I help you with this fine day?" he didn't seem to suspect a thing, and Edwina steeled her spine.

"Lord Daro is likely to arrive, invited, to apologize and propose to me personally," she explained simply.

Alaric's icy blue eyes almost glared suspiciously at her, but otherwise her brother looked too calm, "and why is your former mentor coming to apologize and then propose?" he signed and rubbed his face, "no, don't tell me, I can already figure it out." And then, to Edwina's amazement, Alaric started to laugh. "I have run out of siblings, there is no easy sibling right now; you're all determined to age me prematurely. I think Calvin might be the closest to not giving me anxiety, and that man likes his secrets."

"You're laughing?" Edina was so shocked at his reaction that she had to sit down.

"Winnie," he shook his head, still amused, "Blair's Courting my best friend, Calvin FINALLY realized he's in love with his, Derbie's about to get married, you're going to the university and will likely be shortly engaged, Farran's in Cador living with a Duke, Gavin and Eniola were married by the Queen, and Hida had nearly died twice this Season; if I don't laugh I'll scream."

Her laughter surprised her, but Alaric had left himself out of that list, "you're getting married the same day Derbie is, but I see your point," she sighed and leaned back. "I sent a letter and the ring back to Lord Daro and took Blair's advice about telling him that his apology needed to be said to my face, and so can his proposal."

"When did you send it?" Alaric looked at his time piece.

"Before coming to speak with you, why?" Edwina figured it's been maybe ten minutes, maximum fifteen.

"He'll be here soon then; if you want to prepare, now's your chance," Alaric dismissed her.

"It's a fifteen minute carriage ride away, the letter I sent has likely only just arrived," she argued, doubting that Lord Daro would already be on his way.

If she'd bet on it, Edwina would have lost.

Lord Daro arrived less than five minutes later, not in a carriage but actually astride a horse without saddle. Edwina was privileged enough to see him all but leap off the horse's back to rush towards the front door.

"He landed with good form," Hida's voice surprised Edwina, and she spun around to see All of her siblings except Farran somehow lurking nearby. "Maybe your Lord is more athletic than I gave him credit for." It was a lovely compliment, and then her baby sister kept talking, "of course, he'd have to be given the bruises I saw and the logistics of how..."

"Pinky!" Blair reacted the quickest, "anything that'd be in one of my red covered romances isn't something you say in front of the boys."

"Ignore her, Hida," Calvin smiled, "tell me everything later; Daro's being escorted in."

Their butler had answered the door, and Edwina walked to the top of the grand stairs leading down. Lord Daro's normally carefully styled hair was windswept and tousled, his wire framed glasses were perilously perched on the end of his nose, and she could see the flush of adrenaline rouging his skin. And the moment he spotted Edwina at the top of the stairs, he ignored the butler and any other witness present to drop to his knees in obvious, humble supplication.

"You're right to demand my apology be done to your face, at your feet," he sounded like he'd run the distance here, and Edwina was too surprised to remind him that her letter had simply demanded that he come say what he'd written to her face. "I am so sorry Edwina, for my actions and reactions, and for hurting you. No doubt your family would like to express their displeasure with me at the Bouts, and I would willingly stand still for your brothers to beat me, but I will still beg you to forgive me, and allow me to propose to you."

"So, beg," Blair called out tauntingly, and Edwina head the sound of impact and a whispered scolding, but she didn't look away from Daro.

He didn't seem to care that almost her entire family was watching, a literal audience for his declarations. It should have felt mortifying, a public spectacle of a private moment, but Edwina instead felt oddly proud. She had loved this man quietly, from a distance, and utterly discreet up until the feast in her honour. And then she'd thought he'd loved her back, that they'd made love but then he'd seemed ashamed.

"I do not regret loving you, my Lady," he was still on his knees, "even though I should have been the gentleman, the one to hold against temptation until your Debut. You are the kind of woman deserving of a Letter of Intent after her Debutant, of a long and romantic Courtship, and a wedding in your house, surrounded by your family. I am only sorry that my eagerness to love you deprived us of that." Edwina appreciated the delicate nature he was using to describe their intimacy on the balcony. "And I am sorry that I made you feel like a dirty little secret; the truth is that I have loved you for longer than is likely appropriate. For a year now I have fought every masculine urge until your celebration, and then I finally threw propriety to the winds. You are the woman I love, my muse and my Master, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Can you forgive me?"

"I can," Edwina kept her response brief, emotions as bottled under pressure as Blair's champagnes.

Lord Daro's shoulders slumped as if a great burden has finally been lifted, but then he swiftly rose to his feet. "Then, Lady Edwina Briggs, can I ask for you to wear my engagement ring, and one day marry me?"

"You can ask," she heard muffled, incomprehensible whispers from her siblings huddled to eavesdrop, but none voiced an objection.

He'd already stood, now Lord Daro strode up the stairs towards her as if he were meeting the Queen. The ring box she hadn't dared open before was in his hand, and the moment Lord Daro was two steps below her he once again dropped to his knees in supplication. "I want you to know I would be begging to marry you even if we hadn't been intimate, now I'm simply begging sooner than my original plans had been," this he spoke to her alone, ignoring her family as well as she could. "Can I please gift you this ring, call you my fiancée, and plan to be your husband in the future?" he made the actual proposal loud enough for the audience to hear.

"You can," Edwina managed not to sound breathy, but she felt a little like swooning despite her resolve.

Lord Daro opened the ring box and revealed the ring it'd taken him a week to send to her. It was an agate stone set in what looked like a red steel band. It wasn't the delicate filigree one might expect one artist to gift another, but Edwina cherished it. This was a rare example of the ring's value being in her knowledge of its sentimentality; this had been his grandmother's ring, and she had been an artist as well. She had been the one to teach Lord Daro when he was too young for the university, and she'd died before he Debuted.

"You'll really marry me?" he seemed so uncertain suddenly, as if he expected her to change her mind.

"I will," her confirmation made him smile, and then the part of her related to Blair came out, "and I will continue to torment you, my Lord Daro."

Now his smile had a wicked edge to it, and Edwina heard a stern throat clearing, as if you remind her of the listening ears. She held her hand out to him, and he slid the ring onto her; it'd have to be seen by a jewel smith to have it adjusted, but she adored it already. And then, to her delight, Lord Daro rose from his knees to kiss her; picking her up to get them onto the riser and off of the stairs.

At least three of her siblings started clapping in celebration, and Edwina heard Hida's unfortunately verbal musing, "I wonder where he'll leave bruises on her this time?" then someone gave a smack and Hida's next comment was too muffled to understand.

All Edwina could do was smile and laugh while Lord Daro looked at her fondly. It wasn't a childing dream, she really was going to marry this man. And depending on how like her brother she was, it may be a quicker wedding than expected; she didn't know yet.