Love & All Things Broken

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NOTE:

A few notes about this 온라인카지노게임: While there's no cheating, the male main character makes a significant mistake by essentially becoming emotionally distant from his wife. This is a reconciliation 온라인카지노게임 where Caden (MMC) and Felicity (FMC) work things out together. If you prefer other types of romance, this might not be for you. The 온라인카지노게임 focuses on Caden recognizing his failures and making amends, understanding how he missed so much in his life, while Felicity discovers herself and learns that personal growth doesn't mean sacrificing her marriage. The 온라인카지노게임 comes with emotional nuance that will follow a path in which a couple finds themselves and their love again. It is not a fast read. But I hope it will be a memorable one for you. It has certainly been a memorable one for me!

The Dior bag gleamed under the kitchen lights like a beacon of everything wrong with my marriage.

I stood frozen in the doorway. The grocery bags cut into my fingers as I watched my stepdaughter Macy trace her fingers over the embossed leather.

It was the exact shade of powder beige I'd circled in the screenshot. The precise gold hardware I'd included and then texted to Caden weeks ago with the message: 

Me: This is what I want for my birthday. Please don't send Lauren to get something for me this year. I just want this. Nothing else...Just this.

"That's a beautiful purse, Macy," I said, forcing my voice to remain calm and steady.

Caden's head snapped up from the algebra worksheet in front of them. His blue eyes widened with what was clearly panic. "Oh, hey babe. Didn't hear you come in." His voice sounded gravelly and his gaze darted between me and the purse. "We were just—"

"I found it today!" Macy chirped, hugging the bag to her chest. "It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. Dad said it was for the first day of school next month. Isn't he the best?"

The grocery bags slipped from my numb fingers.

"Shit." Caden jumped up as a jar of my favorite tomato basil sauce hit the ground and shattered across our kitchen floor. "Felicity, are you okay?"

No. The word wouldn't come out, feeling instead stuck in my throat. I stared at the mess the sauce had made.

My birthday was in four days. The purse - my fucking purse, the one thing I'd specifically asked for - was now promised to an eleven-year-old for the first day of school.

"I'm fine." I coughed out. I grabbed paper towels from the counter, tossing towels on the floor to contain the sauce before it spread any further. "Macy, honey, why don't you take your homework upstairs?"

"But we're not done—"

"Now, please." I snapped out. The sharp edge in my voice made both their heads shoot up from where they'd been watching me clean the sauce.

I sighed. My shoulders drooping and I softened my voice. I gave Macy a small smile that should have shouted to my husband how much my heart was breaking. "You can finish after dinner."

Macy gathered her things, clutching the designer purse like a security blanket. "Are you okay, Felicity? Did I do something wrong?"

"Of course not, sweetheart." The lie burned my throat. "Go on upstairs."

She bounced out, the $2,000 bag swinging from her thin shoulder. A bag I had no doubt would be battered within a week by an eleven-year-old's carelessness.

"Felicity—" Caden started.

I shushed him and once she was out of hearing range I spit out "Don't."

I went back to cleaning the sauce up. "Just... don't."

"Let me explain. She found it when she was looking for her old ballet shoes. She fell in love with it, kept going on about how sophisticated it made her feel, how the other girls would think she was so grown up..." He knelt beside me, reaching for the paper towels. "What was I supposed to say?"

"How about 'That's Felicity's birthday present'?" I jerked away from his touch. "How about 'No, sweetheart, that belongs to someone else'? How about literally anything other than giving away the one fucking gift I have actually asked you for in years!?"

His face went through a series of expressions—guilt, frustration, then that defensive set of his jaw I knew too well. "It's just a purse, Felicity. I'll just get you another one."

"Just a purse?" I stood slowly, sauce-stained paper towels clenched in my fists. "If it was just a purse, then why didn't you just tell her no?"

"You didn't see her face. She was so happy—"

"So, what then ... " The words exploded out of me, eons of swallowed frustrations finally breaking free. "So her happiness—God, when did mine stop mattering? When did I—"

"That's not fair—"

"Three anniversaries!" I threw the towels in the trash and slammed the top shut. "Two birthdays! You forget so many of the main events in our lives—the things that are so important to me."

Caden took a step toward me and I stepped back.

"You get that for years you've sent Lauren to pick out my gifts because you can't be bothered. It's always great getting things from my husband that are sent c/o his assistant." I turned away from him. Facing the sink, I started washing the vegetables for dinner. "The one time - the ONE time - I ask for something specific, you give it to your daughter because she looked happy when she found it?" Fed up, I turned the water off and started pulling things from the fridge for dinner.

"She's just a child—"

"That's right. And children should have boundaries, not just what they want! Who have parents who teach them the difference between yes and no." I spun to face him. "But you can't do that, can you? Just like you can't say no when Jessica calls crying. You answer your ex-wife's call at any hour regardless of whether Macy is with us. You don't set boundaries for her either, like when she texts at midnight. Don't remember your own wife's birthday but somehow never forget school play or dance recital."

"Those are for Macy—"

"Yes! And they are things you SHOULD remember. All I ask is to be remembered TOO!! I'm an afterthought. The person whose gift you have purchased by your assistant. Why do I have to fight to be cared about?"

He stood slowly, and I watched his CEO face slide into place - the one he uses for difficult meetings or recalcitrant employees. "You're being dramatic Felicity. I'll buy you another purse. A better one."

I walked to the other side of the kitchen, putting the island between us. After putting the groceries away, I looked at him and saw he was still standing in the same spot.

"I can't believe you think this is just about the purse?" I scoffed. "It's about you just not caring. You don't seem to get that you gave away something that was meant especially for me. You don't even—you've never even bothered to figure out what I actually wanted. Instead, I had to tell you."

I slammed the cabinet door and was moving around the kitchen, unable to stop myself at this point. "Then finally I found something that I really wanted. I mean - God! I sent you the details—didn't that tell you how much it would mean to me? And you thought so little of it. Of me. That you gave it away."

I felt my head and shoulders just slump. "Caden, don't you understand that it's about being so low on your priority list that a child's whim matters more than your wife's birthday?"

"I told you, she found it and—"

"You don't get it. Or you don't care to get it. Husbands protect their wives' gifts. But you'd rather I be disappointed than deal with her being sad for a couple of minutes."

"That's not what this is—"

"It is. That's exactly what it is." I was defeated. "Why is it okay that I have to sacrifice. That I have to walk in to my own home and see your daughter with my gift. And you didn't even think about how I'd feel. You didn't even think to ask her to hide it."

His silence was answer enough.

I turned away, unable to look at him anymore. I could see my reflection in the kitchen window. I looked haggard. My hair askew. Makeup smudged and running from my tears. My dress from work splattered with sauce. When had I become this woman? The one who accepted crumbs while everyone else got the whole cake?

"I'll get the purse back," he said finally. "I'll tell Macy I made a mistake."

"Don't bother." I looked at him. Really looked at my husband. "You want to traumatize her by taking back a gift from her daddy? You want to make her think it's somehow my issue that she can't have the gift? Better yet, you want to give me something that you gave someone else? What could possibly be worse now?"

"Then what do you want me to do?"

"It doesn't matter anymore. You can't right this boat Caden. All I wanted was for you to think of me first. Just this once." I headed for the stairs, exhaustion settling into my bones. Fuck dinner. Why should I cook tonight after all of this?

"Where are you going?"

"Guest room."

"Felicity, come on. You're overreacting—"

I stopped on the third step, looking back at him standing in our mess of a kitchen. "You know what? That's the problem. You think me feeling forgotten is overreacting. I think I've run out of words at this point. I honestly don't know how else to help you understand. And I can't figure out why I have to try so hard. I can't for the life of me figure out how in fifteen minutes of arguing, you haven't even apologized. Not even once."  

"I'm sorry Felicity."

"Don't bother. It's not much of an apology at this point. It's merely a response to another time I had to remind you to remember me. Do me a favor Caden. My birthday is in four days. Tell me how old I'll be."

The silence stretched between us. His mouth opened, closed, opened again. Nothing. "Of course I know how old you'll be. It's insulting you'd even ask."

"Forty," I said with a sigh. "I'll be forty. Can you make sure you tell Lauren how it's a milestone birthday?" With as much sarcasm as I could muster up, I continued, "that way, when she goes out to panic-buy whatever she has to pick for my birthday this year, she'll get me something just super great." 

I climbed the stairs, each step heavier than the last. I heard him call my name. But I didn't turn back.

There was nothing else to say tonight. I looked around the guest room. Cold and impersonal. I sat on the bed and just let the tears fall. It wasn't about the purse. It had never been about the purse. It was about being invisible in my own marriage, about watching my husband bend over backward for everyone except me.