Chapter 61

                                        

                                              
Chapter 61
Published: August 31st, 2023
"Blaise is fucking lying," was the first sentence in Draco's journal. It was followed by a few choice swear words.
Harry still wasn't eager to read his diary. He had tossed and turned all night about the decision. In the morning, Ron and Hermione were eyeing him like he might explode... or fall apart. Harry wasn't sure which one was worse, but he was strangely numb. He wasn't at all worried about the headlines or what people were speculating. The mystery of the diary was enough to pull his attention.
He told Ron and Hermione that he had to go home and didn't wait for them to approve. He got the diary out of his safe hiding spot under the floorboards in his room. Then he returned to Ron and Hermione's, lest he mess up the Locking Charms on it. He told them that he was going to relax and locked himself in his room. Rose and Hugo were still at their grandparents' house.
It took several minutes of emotional wrangling until he decided to unlock the journal. He carefully opened the book and read Draco's first line. Not exactly inspiring him to read further. There could be things Blaise didn't want him to know either. But he picked it back up, unable to let his curiosity die. Through the next lines... paragraphs... pages... he buried himself in Draco's confusing and unorganized thoughts.
Blaise gave me this for Christmas... he has one, too, and he said that he doesn't have to worry about anyone reading it. Is it really safe to write my deepest secrets in here? 
Well, Pansy is definitely hexed blind from reading this. Lucky for her, I just have to touch her to release the curse. So... Blaise is not lying. 
He also said that this book will only let me write the truth. Or at least my truth. I can't lie to myself, apparently. How about that... the truth? 
Pansy's a ni- what? I can't write "nice"? Fine. Pansy's an annoying bint and can't keep her nose out of other people's things. 
Huh, maybe Blaise isn't lying about that the truth thing, either?
Vince is a blundering fool and can't form a single intelligent thought on his own. Greg is an overbearing meathead who would turn on me the second it suited him. Vince would too. 
Huh... that's my truth. Blaise said that it didn't necessarily mean it is the truth... it's what I feel. Apparently... I feel like my friends and my betrothed are gold-digging whores. Huh. What about Blaise? He's not a gold-digging whore. He gave me this journal or diary or whatever. He must either want something or does like me. I must find out. Now... time to find my truth on the rest of my house.
Harry snorted as Draco spent pages analyzing "his truth". Harry didn't care that Millicent was a closeted lesbian who persecuted other lesbians, but it was interesting to read as Draco deftly lay bare his house's secrets in his own derisive words. But on page 10, his ramblings turned toward his parents.
My mother loves me. I love her. Well, that's a good truth. My father... lo-
My father doesn't love me. He loves... power... fame... and fortune. Mother and I are just ways to achieve that.
I lo- 
I ha-
Well, I don't love or hate my father. That's rather... bleak. I just want him to... accept me... love me. Is it so hard? Just because I'm not as smart as Granger? He just can't let that go. Fuck... it hurt so bad when he got the results. It's not my fault! 
It's Gran- WTF? It's Gran- why can't I write it? Granger... she... it's her fa- WHAT THE FUCK! If it's not her fault? Who's is it? The teachers? Right... rhetorical question. Fine. It's the teacher's fa- Then who brain!? Who's left if it isn't me, her, or the asshole teachers? Am I supposed to blame society? Fuck you, diary!