Everything is Alright

                                        

                                              
Dedicated to tee_gee who taught me how to listen for 온라인카지노게임 ideas in songs... and the love of Drarry. 
Credit to: The Glorious Sons - Everything Is Alright
*Lyrics slightly changed for gender conformity.

~Strangely written in 1st POV. It was freaking weird. I don't like it. But for fun... enjoy~

Everything is Alright
Well, I spent all my money on a pack of cigarettes, brooding for a guy that I love with the name I can't forget. I sat there smoking the last one, thinking about that night he taught me how to laugh, and I taught him how to slow dance. It was the only night we ever had. When I tried to take him home, he said, "You don't stand a chance," or close enough. I hadn't tried to get him back.
I walked down the street in muggle London, mostly forsaken by all who know me. My father hates my guts, now. I won't hide what I am. I'm the closest thing my mother had to a daughter. I used to be ashamed of that, but now I'm kind of flattered. It's who I am. I learned that my weakness is a weapon anyway. I'll use it to prove that I'm not who they think I am.
They said I was nothing but a Death Eater... never mentioning that I had no choice. When they found out I was gay and saw me with him, they called me all sorts of names. I stopped going to that pub we met in. I stopped looking for him every time I walked into a new one. I didn't seek him out. I didn't try to get with anyone. To them, I was an asshole, so I haven't touched a pretty thing in forty days.
Forty days. Since I saw him... touched him. I took the last drag on my cigarette. It was almost out. I tell myself everything is alright, if only for the night. But that's how I survive. I forgot what it feels like not to be in constant emotional pain. We were so close. We were right there. I flicked the butt to the bin. What could have been.
I sat down on a bench, looking up at the sky. I remembered when I slept last night. I set out on a dream that I couldn't understand. We were both there, just staring at each other without any words said. It made me happy, sad, love, lonely and I don't know what I had when I had it. We were fire and ice that could have been epic. The best love 온라인카지노게임... but it's gone now. I know it's my fault. A few too many favours from a few too many fake friends. I tainted my own future.
I work in the muggle world, trying to make ends meet. I go to the pub every night and one night... he came in with his friends. He didn't ignore me. He came to me, but he still left without even an owl. I used to look for him. Walked the streets every night looking for him. Every day I wake up in the afternoon and do it all again. I have nothing and work paycheck to paycheck. The few friends I have left have abandoned me, too.
Yeah, I punched a man on his wedding night. I'm still trying to figure out how to apologize to Blaise. He pushed me too far, trying to break my mood. There is no way out for me. I saw greatness, and I want it back. I drank myself stupid for days. But I learned that morning, I can't fix nothing anyway. I lost him that night, so I haven't touched a pretty thing in 40 days.
Everything is alright, I tell myself, looking at the stormy night sky. If only for the night. There was no promise of tomorrow. I forgot what it feels like not to be drunk every night. No, just keep saying everything is alright, if only for the night. Tomorrow is another day, another trial, but just get through tonight. I forgot what it feels like to feel safe and loved.
Tears stream out of my eyes and bury them in my hands. I mentally ask him, "Can you feel it, baby? I can feel it, baby. I almost feel his thoughts... his desires. I feel it coming through. But nothing really comes. I drop my hands and open my eyes. Just chant everything is alright. I just wish I could have him one last time, if only for the night. Fuck, I forgot what it feels like to touch someone.
Yeah. Everything is alright. Yeah. Hang on, if only for the night.
I forgot what it feels like to be loved. To have hoped. To have a dream of happiness. It's gone now. He's gone. I had my moment, and I pushed him too fast. I didn't even know if he was gay. He probably wasn't. That was why. I disgusted him. You can accept queers, sure, but run if they start coming on to you. But he danced with me? He was drunk.
Fuck. I need to be drunk. Fuck, I spent all my money on a pack of cigarettes. Now I want to get drunk for a guy that I love with the name I forget... want to forget. But the alcohol goes away, and I learned that morning, I can't fix nothing anyway. I'm still without money, family and love, waiting for the next paycheck to drown out my sorrows that won't ever leave me. I know there's no one but him for me. So I haven't touched a pretty thing in forty days.
I hear footsteps and look up. War had taught me to be on edge. It's him. I stand up and face him in shock. We just stare at each other, neither speaking. Minutes pass. Harry whispers my name... Draco... and smiles. My heart unclenches.
Maybe... everything is alright.