Ashes of her heart

As soon as Lily stepped out of Hayes & Co., a breath she didn't know she'd been holding slipped past her lips. The city air felt light now, maybe because for the first time in a year, she was one step closer to the life she used to dream of.

Your work so far is amazing.

His voice still echoed in her mind. Noah Hayes. The name alone carried weight in the fashion world, the self-made man everyone admired, envied, whispered about in hallways, and glossy magazines.

And yet when he'd looked at her, his eyes had seemed to see too much. It sent a shiver down her spine that lingered long after she'd left his office.

The cab she booked pulled up by the curb. She climbed in quietly, murmuring her destination. The city blurred past the window, grey skies, glass buildings, and damp cobblestones that still glistened from last night's rain. A city of dreams, they said. Maybe she thought,

One day mine will come true too.

When the cab dropped her outside her small apartment, Lily thanked the driver and climbed the narrow stairs, key clutched tight in her fist. The tiny flat was still and silent when she stepped inside her little sanctuary. She sank onto her old couch, staring at the ceiling.

Tomorrow, she promised herself, I would start again.

***

The next morning, Lily woke before dawn. She moved through her small routine shower, simple makeup, and half-up hair pinned neatly back. She chose a soft lilac dress and an overcoat, which made her feel both safe and professional.

The company cab waited downstairs, she grabbed an apple on her way out double double-checking her bag, her sketchbook, phone, and portfolio. Not today, she told herself. No Mistakes.

When she stepped inside Hayes & Co. That morning, the polished glass door felt like a gateway to a different world, one where her past couldn't touch her, if only she kept her head down and her pencil moving.

Her new team leader, Aisha, was warm and reassuring. She guided Lily through the orientation, introducing her to the rest of the small design team. They were kind or at least polite, and Lily clung to that shred of normal.

Before long, Aisha handed her a folder.

"Here's the theme for the upcoming show, go through it, sketch out a few ideas, and let's meet this afternoon to discuss, okay?"

Lily nodded quickly, "Thank you."

"If you need help. Just ask me. All right?" Aisha smiled, and Lily almost believed that maybe this time, someone meant it.

She settled at her desk, flipping through the mood boards and color swatches, fantasy.

The theme felt ironic; her reality was anything but a fairytale. But, maybe just maybe, she could still create beauty from broken pieces.

She was so deep in fabric patterns and rough sketches that she didn't notice the time slip by until the girl beside her leaned over.

"Hey, Lily, right?"

She looked up, startled. "Yes."

"Im Jane, assistant designer. Come on, it's lunchtime. Let's go before all the good stuff's gone."

Before Lily could find an excuse, Jane was already pulling her to her feet, chattering about cafeteria specials. Lily tried to smile, grateful for Jane's easy warmth even if her mind screamed to stay invisible.

***

The cafeteria buzzed with life, people from all departments laughing over trays of food, gossiping about deadlines and clients. Jane loaded her plate with practice ease, dropping a second forkful of pasta onto Lily's tray before she could protest.

They found seats by the window, the spring rain still dotting the glass. A few more teammates joined them, loud and friendly.

"Hey, who's the new girl?" asked the guy who didn't look like he worked with fabric.

"This is Lily's new joiner on my team," Jane answered. Lily gave him a polite nod.

He grinned at her like a cat who'd spotted a cornered mouse. "Hey, beautiful. I'm Ethan."

Lily stiffened, but Jane rolled her eyes and smacked his arm. "Seriously? Try not to scare off the new hire for once."

Ethan pouted, "I'm just being welcoming."

"Yeah, try a new line, Mr Romeo. You've used that on everyone since last summer."

Their bickering pulled a soft laugh from others. Lily focused on her plate, grateful for the distraction and grateful for Jane. But as the conversation drifted back to office gossip, Lily's mind wandered. She felt like that familiar tug inside her ribs that reminded her she didn't belong anywhere for too long.

When the meal was over, she mumbled a quick excuse and slipped out, eager for the safety of her sketch book.

***

She rounded a corner, clutching her folder to her chest, lost in thought, and collided hard with someone coming the other way.

Her sketchbook slid from her hands. The world tilted, she braced from the cold slap of the floor, the burn of embarrassment, the stares.

But none came,

Strong hands caught her waist just in time, steadying her. Warm palms. Steady arms are a barrier between her and every echo of her past.

She opened her eyes, Noah Hayes.

He held her like she was breakable glass, his jade eyes locked on her, searching. Lily's heartbeat slammed against her rib, so loud it drowned out the hum of the office behind them.

"You okay?" his voice was low, even, but his furrowed brows just for a second.

She managed a nod. "Yes, I am so sorry, I didn't see—"

He didn't let go right away. His thumb brushed the fabric of her coat, so subtle she wondered if she imagined it.

"Be careful", he said, finally cold again. Detached.

"Yes, sir".

She stopped to grab her sketchbook, and when she stood away, he was already turning away, the ghost of the moment disappearing like smoke.

Lily pressed the folder to her chest as if it could hold her inside her ribcage. Don't read into it, she scolded herself. He's just your boss. He doesn't see you. He can't.

She slipped back to her desk, ignoring the curious glances. She opened her sketchbook, pencil in her hand. The lines blurred and danced under her fingertips.

Work. dreams. That's all that matters now.

Not him.

Not his eyes.

Not the warmth she hadn't felt in so long.

Just the work.

Just the dream.